a practical guide to leave social media
The algorithm is working against you. It is a formidable, ever-evolving tool born and funded by billionaires that employs thousands of people to design, maintain and upgrade it to seek and hold your attention for as long as possible.
Trying to overcome social media addiction may feel like fighting a guerrilla war against a sophisticated, professional and incredibly well-equipped military force. But if history taught us something about guerrilla warfare is that it is incredibly effective against modern armies[1].
You must approach the algorithm the same way, employing small but yet effective tactics to render it powerless against you.
In this post, I walk you through what I have done to achieve a streak away from my favorite social media platforms, start a blog and invest time into other stuff that aggregates value to my life, career and well-being.
Before we start, you must be aware: this shit is not easy, and it took me over a year to master. Do not expect instant results. Instead, be mindful that small actions will do greater good for you in the future. Remember, we're waging a guerrilla war to rescue ourselves from addiction.
make it irrelevant
Your feed is only as relevant as you let it be. It is monitoring your likes, the time you spend watching a certain type of content, and how much you interact with it by sharing, commenting, following or replaying.
The first strategy I employed was to unfollow my favorite accounts.
I started by unfollowing the NFL during the off-season, and I saw a huge portion of my feed be filled with something else. I then unfollowed my favorite influencers and resorted to other forms of search when I wanted a smart opinion on something I was looking to buy or consume (Reddit, blogs, the searchable web, ...). Afterward, came the meme pages. If I wanted a cheap laugh, I would enter manually the @ of the account on the search bar, spend some time on that specific account, and then I would be done.
At last, came people, and this was the hardest.
the fake feeling of missing out caused by social media
We all have this huge fear of missing out, and removing people from your account will amplify that feeling on the scale of the hundreds. This is caused by the overload of information that people share on the platform. You are following every step they take, sometimes from the moment they wake up to the moment they go to bed. You see firsthand their accomplishments and (sometimes) their failures. When you think about removing someone, there's this thing in the back of your head saying that you would miss out on all of that. Ask yourself: Does that information really matters at that exact moment you are consuming?
Many people tend to focus only on the feed aspect of social media, but one of the greatest hooks of every platform is the Story-sharing feature. Some people post so much on their story feeds that you might spend minutes watching updates on someone's daily life. Even further, you might be pulling down the refresh button constantly just to see if someone has posted something new.
I completely understand how some people might enjoy that lurking aspect of Stories, where you are participating passively on someone's day. But that costs you - it costs your time, the very valuable time you could spend with loved ones, improving your skills or living your own life.
If you haven't seen that person for more than 2 or 3 years, even though it may seem like you are still part of their lives, it may not be the case. This is an important assertion: Real connections are done through time together - not through liking someone's stories of the frappé they just got at Starbucks when the last time you have talked to each other was months ago.
the 100 rule
Then came the time when I had to establish the golden rule that I could not follow more than 100 accounts. My thought process was that I absolutely do not have 100 friends. Think about your last birthday and how many people reached out to shoot a message to your DM (not a pre-made text or image saying "Happy Birthday" or a meme - a real message saying how much they appreciate you and your life and your presence in their lives). That may give you an approximate number. Aim to that and try your hardest to go over your limit.
make it limited
By performing the first tactic, you will quickly run out of things to see on the platform. You will be blessed with the following disclaimer on your feed:
This means you are on the right track.
When you limit the amount of content you consume, the platform will quickly try to suggest you new things in hopes of grabbing your attention. That content is somewhat tailored by the accounts you follow and the things you like. If you stop following bullshit accounts and limit the ingestion of their content, the algorithm will turn in your favor by understanding that you engage the most with the content produced by your friends.
Since they aren't (we hope) around the clock posting stuff on their feed, you have successfully limited your account and stopped the infinite doom-scrolling cycle.
make it temporary
The third step was to limit my time on the platform to be allowed only during the weekend.
I would install the app on Saturday morning and have to uninstall it Sunday, 23h59. This effectively limited my time even further, and I could offload the amount of information and updates that happened while using it during the week. That allowed me to focus on work and studies from Monday through Friday.
During the weekend, it is natural that we go out, perform our hobbies or spend time with loved ones. This additional aspect of the weekend reduces the usage of the platform even further, as I would never prefer staying home doom-scrolling in favor of seeing someone, going to my folk's place for some coffee, or going outdoors.
This is the final step for you to start becoming uninterested in social media.
make it invisible
The final step might feel natural. Challenge yourself to uninstall it permanently for as long as you feel you can. If you have followed the tips so far, you may feel that social media maybe is... boring. You may get the excitement of meeting a friend in real life and talk with them for hours about what happened to them the last days. This is the joy you have rescued back.
lessons learned
I had this idea after reading James Clear's Atomic Habits[2] in 2023. In the book, James discusses in a deeper level strategies that emulate some of those I have cited here in an agnostic manner that you can apply to other areas of your life. I strongly recommend that book if you are interested in the subject.
At last, I would like to point out that the intentional use of social media platforms is not a problem. Balance over abstinence is sometimes the way to go. By employing these strategies, you may get closer to the balance you are aiming for - just don't go full commando like I did and uninstall the app completely.
Remember to keep close the people that matter the most to you. Send them a message. Be old school and write an SMS (or even a letter!). Call them, ask how they are, and ask if they want to come over to play board games. Nuking your social media account must not be an excuse to isolate yourself from friends; it must be the catalyst for enforcing you to connect back with them.